Pyre!!!

(As written more than 14 years ago!!!)
When I was up in the heaven,
I asked God one day,
Give me a Body,
A companion;
To be with me,
My Soul

I came down to this earth,
To love life -
With my Beautiful body
And my Soul

I scarred my body
And slashed it;
Granted I took it for

Then one fine day,
I begged God,
To call me,
To give me death

And when I finally died -
My ugly Body burnt,
And all that was left of me,
Was my Beautiful Soul!!!

A few Random and Volatile Thoughts

I have been spending a lot of time off late,
wondering why people around me are sometimes so willing
to make others happy,
make them feel loved........

Why do they want others to feel positive, more driven, feel alive and so on......
Is it for themselevs or is it really the others????
What should one do when you are on the recieving end.
Accept it gladly and walk off??? Can you be that selfish???
Or simply reciprocate??? Reciprocate to what???
The goodness!!! Yep, the goodness, I guess.

But you cant just keep reciprocating all the damn time....can you???
You got more gut than that. You can be equally giving.....
So should you walk a few steps further.....
But, where??? With whom???
You dont even know if they want to walk along.

Ive been getting so many random and volatile thoughts all the damn time.........
Perhaps its not worth it.....Or maybe it is!!!

Its like you meet a new person, and he gives you a whole new perspective....
and then you are all so awed by it.
You move on, and you meet another new person,
and there he is with all his interpretations which are almost good enough
to make you have yet another new perspective and trash the old one........

Damn, what do you hold on to!!!
What do you believe???
Is the entire world a bunch of liars.......
Are they all metculously planning each move to make you fall into their trap.....
Is your victim really worth such time and effort......

Am I hallucinating or are they???

Times up....I got to go.

You have a Beau day :-)

Momentary lapse of Reason :-)

Monkeys of the Mind.....:-) and some even outside.... :))))))
They enchant and sometimes make me go WILDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!
:P:P:P:P :P:P

While communicating with a friend :-)

Hey, why cant I stop laughing at what you write....
You got bizzare and erratic thot process like mine...
Yipee.....am I glad someone else is as mad as me ....
Yeah I read....The color and the music...:-)

Pretend to be 8 and youll be a beautiful soul..

Hmmm...You want me to Return to the self
Yeah....the return to innocnence... :-)
Cant pretend to be 8, forgotten what it was like...
Damn, I lost my sense....am I alright???

Practice "Who would cry when you die"

Oh!!! They'll just burn me down to the ashes.....
And tears shed...even they shall dry...

And hey,
I could survive on Vodka and some gin....
Cant they make a cocktail of me...
I could be a monk....my nirvana as the topping...

Grow wings .. use your mind to fly like :Illusions - richard bach / Fly like an eagle - Steve miller band.

Hah!! Richard bach....
Made me fly HIGH like a seagull.....
Aaah!!! Such Illusions....
Wings cropped now :-(
Naaah!!! They were mere delusions....

Age : Guess !! young at heart, younger in the soul and very prankful!!

My heart beats till it beats,
My Soul - an immortal.....
And yeah, years simply keep adding by...
Age....A mere number...
Yeah, we go counting high....

Redo your building

Can ruins ever be redone...
I was contemplating demolition......
Ruins serve no purpose....
And no piece of art am I....

BTW - no more crazy gyan ..lets get down to more Megalivin!!

Inspiration....anytime... :-)
Where is the drive???
Megaliving....Yeah, lets get started....:-)
Living failed.....lets give MEGAliving a try!!!

There are no strangers in this world,
Only friends whom you really haven't met.

Friends??? Or strangers???
Friends - Why do they feel like strangers...
They call me - Xenophobic...
AM I??
Or ARE THEY??
Friends or simply passers by.....

Jack welch - there is more juice in that lime..

My minds lazily Numb....:p
Its only the heart thats thinking...
Poor thing....is sooooo much over working :-)

IRIS
(Not living....yeah, MEGAliving!!!! :p:p:p)
March 2005

Being Dragged!!! ooopppssss Tagged :-)

(Hey, don't you dare take offense)
I hate taking such quizzes, but sometimes you gotta do such things for friends.
Not that someone is still gonna be pleased.....But hey, What the heck, its just a quiz :-)
And I'm enjoying it.....Thanks Pranav :-p,
Yeah, for Tagging me :-)

TAG 1

bib·li·o·phile
Will take this one sometime later! I can, right??? And Im not acting pricey either????

TAG 2

Three names I go by:

1) Shelly
(Means Style...Oh! but Im hardly sassy!!!)
2) Shells
(This one's used by my friends.....Perhaps it sounds more chic!)
3) ShellyJelly
(This one just rhymes well.....Nothing more to it:-)

Three Screen Names:

1) Iris
(Yeah, the Goddess of rainbow and yep, that thing in the eye too)
2) Seashells
(Nah.....don'tnt sell shells on the seashore...Haha:-)
3) ~Titli~
(I absolutely adore this one....but for those who know me, yeah I know,
am still at the caterpillar stage)

Three things I like about myself:
(Three??? Nah!!!Therere are so many.....Im excused right???)

1) I like peace, and I cant stand Fights....I abhor them!!!
Isn't this a cool Trait???)
2) My Shoulders!!!
I always liked them since childhood....You can call me narcissist for this one!!!
3) My vivid Imagination,
that sometimes breaks all bounds and leaps to the unknown territory.
4) Im extremely sensitive to other's needs.
And I am so very proud of this one.....Not very many people can achieve this :-)
5) I can be WILLLLDDDDD!!!! And love it too!!!

:-)

Three things I don't like about myself:
(Can this one be longer???? Pleaseeeeee)

1) My oversensitivity
2) Believing everyone and anyone
3) Not being able to say NO
4) My fluctuating Moods and the Paranoia
5) Losing my Temper and then screaming at the ones who matter most
6) My inability to accept compliments Gracefully!!!
7) Letting a few important years of my life go sheer waste.
8) Not making the most of what I have.
9) My acne

Three things that scare me:
(Hey, what's this obsession with three???)

1) Death
I read last Night : The Future's uncertain and Death is always near - Am scared!!!
2) That Void increasing each passing day.
3) My recklessness/Fearlessness.....
4) Obsessions
5) Lizards, Ghosts!!! They scare the Hell out of me!!!

Three essentials:

1) My Freedom
2) Few Clothes I can't do without
3) Thoda bahut Money

Three things I like in the opposite sex:

1) They cannot live without us :-p
2) They enjoy pampering us
3) They go weak on the knees when you flash your pretty smile at them :-)

Three things that I want to do badly now:

1) Get a Massage
2) Sleep
3) Finish this Quiz

Three careers I am considering right now:
(Umm......I cant be any one thing!!!! I have to have a bit of everything :-)

A counselor, A Spiritual Healer :-P , His Disciple, A Yoga Instructor, A Psycho Analyst, A Corporate trainer, A Rally Driver, A Theater artist, A Travel Guide, A Florist, A wedding Planner, A social Activist, A Rocker, A Bartender, A priest and A poet, A Pub Owner/restauranteur, A Disc Jockey, A mesmeriser........:-)

Three places I'd love to go on vacation:

1) Mclodganj, Leh
2) Brazil
3) Greece (Yeah P, I wanna go there too :-)

Three kids' names I like (Why?):

1) Poochki
2) Tara
3) Chhoti
I don't know why.....

Three things to do before dying:

1) Walk the road of Excess....
2) Let a few special ones in my Life know,
how much I loved them and that I had my own reasons to walk out.
3) Finally, Give away all that receiveded!!!
Renounce the Worldly....and head for the Himalayas....
and be the Monk I always wanted to be!!!

Who can take this Quiz????

1) Anyone who visits my Blog.
You could consider yourself privileged :-p
2) Anyone who thinks he/she is my friend.
I spent almost 1 hour on this, for a friend......and now I like him for it :-)
3) Anyone who has nothing else to do.
Id say, You IDLE MIND!!! YOU better sit down and DO this right away!!!

PS: THANKSSSSSSS!!!! I was finding myself to be such a waste this weekend!!! But I think, I just pleased two people :-)
I looovvvveeeee this quiz!!!

Who am I???

Am I anything at all???
Do I even exist???
Or am I a figment of someone’s imagination!!!
Yeah, I got a body.... a tangible proof!!
So, I do....

Damn, what’s my purpose???
Hey, do I have a purpose...
Do YOU have a purpose???
Do you have any idea why you are here???
And hey, what are you doing about it????

And me
Am lost!!!
Am I thinking aloud???
Is this thinking at all....

Am a kid....
Nah....am this mature woman with a head held high....
Hahaha!!! Woman of substance....
Or am I.... oh, this so cynical woman....
Who’s doubting every passer by....
And are they all conspiring against me???

Am a princess...
In a guarded Palace…
Hiding from every eye that gapes at me…
But hell!!! My palace is a façade
And the self erected walls…

Am a free soul,
I dare to choose,
But the consequential actions,
Numb me,
And I am a recluse.

Am the master
Of my destiny,
Yet I fail,
As I bow down each time,
Damn!!! I am a slave of my own mind!!!

20th Feb 2005

More from my cage!!!

Pic source: Google

Prisoners,
Aren’t we all?
In this world,
Of Illusion and Choice.

Bonded by love,
Seeking endless joy,
Like Hostages,
We sit and cry.

22nd March 2005

Tammanaon Ki Titliyan

Tammanaon ki Titliyaan,
Aaj subah mere paas bhi aayee,
I was sleeping on my Bed,
They sprinkled me with smiles:-)

When I opened my eyes
I saw a twinkling light,
Each Little titli,
Enjoying an awesome flight,

Hovering over me,
Tickling me,
And giggling with me,
Teasingly they said,

We are tammanaaon ki Titliyaan,
We create magic everywhere we go,
Come catch us, play with us
Else we shall fly!!!!

2nd Feb 2005

PS: Im completely mesmerised by the beauty of Tamanaao ki Titliyaan:-)

(((From my cage)))

The Joy of Life,
Is to know
We are alive,
As one day,
We shall all die.

I fear to live,
I have to die,
Am I dead?
I cannot cry.

The Purpose of life,
Is to Give,
What we receive,
As we cannot take,
When time to leave.

I fear to give,
I may not receive,
Am I lost?
I simply grieve.

The truth of life,
Is to Love all Beings,
As we are All,
Creations of The Supreme.

I fear to Love,
You may not be Mine,
Am I a Prisoner?
Of my own scheme.

(Straight from my cage)
22 March 2005

Odyssey

I felt I was in heaven,
Lit entirely by beautiful diyas,
Engrossed in an everlasting conversation,
With a traveler, the avatar of the Divine,
He, who has found his truth,
After wandering endlessly,
Putting an end to his spiritual quest.

His words to me, Oh so polite,
In complete harmony,
And in tandem with the spiritual message,
Touched the chords of heart and mind,
Belonging to my incognizant soul.

His pearls of wisdom,
And the kindness they beheld,
Rekindled in me, a spark of joy,
I was oblivious to the obvious,
But His pure reasons and thoughts,
Enabled me to open my closed eyes,

The Knowledge he bestowed on me,
Of the absolute and the I,
And all that is truly divine,
Awakened the energy in me,
That was slumbering deep inside,
Compelling me to end the inner turmoil, That is rupturing my soul.
Driving me out of my cocoon,
To explore and brighten my flickering light,

The Paradigm shift,
From Ignorance to Knowledge,
He has set me up for a spiritual journey,
An odyssey of the self.

28 March 2005